Today's reason centers around my 2 middle sons who have asperger's syndrome. They are funny, witty, wickedly smart, but disabled children. They have issues. I am honest about that. But their issues are due to a problem that has existed since birth and not due to character or parenting issues.
In other words, they do the very best that they can.
Today I read about 8-year-old Evelyn Towry and realized that if my boys were in school, that could have easily happened to either of them. Both of them go into a primal state when they are overstimulated. For them it is similar to the reaction of someone with a deep seated phobia that has been triggered. They will do whatever it takes to get out of the situation.
I know this. The boys' therapist knows this. Even our school therapist knows this. But I can guarantee that all the rest of the teachers at the school we are zoned for, do not know this.
I can see this happening at just about every school across this nation.
And that is wrong.
Our autistic children are not going away. We will not institutionalize them for being different. We will not hide them from the public. We will not allow them to be treated as inferior people just because they want to wear a cow sweatshirt. They have the same rights guaranteed int he constitution as every other person in the is country.
Aren't we supposed to be embracing diversity these days? Aren't we all supposed to be more enlightened nowadays? And just how threatening is a cow sweatshirt anyway?
Bev, an autistic adult whose blog I read faithfully, co-oped the diddy:
We're here.
We're weird.
Get used to it.
6 comments:
I am horrified, but not in the least surprised--if that makes sense. It reminds me of my son being required to read a book about an abandoned girl [after BEING abandoned by his birth mother at age 7--and YES the teacher "knew") or my daughter [same school, again the teacher "knew") being assigned an essay to go with a book on what it would feel like to be an orphan. Yes, I raised the roof and yes, I'm glad she's homeschooled again now! My son's many diagnoses made me 'wake up' fast to the level of ignorance in our "education professionals" about how to deal with kids!!! Great post!
Wow! What a painful story. I've been homeschooling for, gosh, about 11 years now. My main reason for starting was that my oldest was ADHD and just not ready for Kindergarten when the time came.
He wasn't officially diagnosed for many years, but I knew. He struggled to learn what his younger brother could learn in a few moments. It was slow and painful at first, but it prepared me. 4 of my 5 boys are ADHD... all to varying degrees with varying results.
What I have learned to see is the amazing gifts they have that wouldn't be recognized in school. For example, two of my boys are visual-spatial learners including my oldest who is a human GPS. He will never get lost. My 4th (who I suspect also suffers from anxiety) is so wildly creative that I would love to spend just one day in his mind. It would be an adventure of the craziest kind I am sure. I could go on... but my point is I am so grateful to be able to homeschool!
That was a difficult story to read, on so many levels. But in short, yes, yet another reason we are homeschoolers. My word, how awful to be at the mercy of people who are so ignorant. Can you imagine?
*sigh* I found some of the comments particularly disturbing: "What were the teachers supposed to do? She was out of control!"
And they completely ignore the fact that she was "out of control" BECAUSE the teacher physically restrained her. The restraint was the CAUSE, not the solution.
The people in this country all too often blindly accept and support authority no matter how wrong and/or illogical.
*sigh* I only meant to wish you a speedy recovery, but then you pressed one of my buttons. Hope you're feeling better soon.
I have a child with Asperger's. He is now almost 20 years old. He has benefitted greatly from being in the public school system, where he has learned to cope with society, other children, other adults, a routine, a schedule, disappointments, and many other things that I could never provide for him at home.
He has made the very best out of his disability and is now a classical music major in college. We refused to label our son and "fought back" against the many attempts from teachers (mostly elementary school) who didn't know what to do with him.
My son now lives away from us and is extremely independent, mature, responsible, intelligent, talented, and (this is the best) resilient and accepted.
His friends love him for who he is, warts and all. Many people don't understand him. He doesn't care about that and neither do we. We involved him in school activities and had conferences with his teachers. He loved the routine of school and he loved learning and being with other children.
No child should be taken away in handcuffs. However, every child (and every person) needs to learn how to assimilate. This is an important lesson that is tough at times, much tougher for those with Asperger's. They can do it and sometimes what is required is a litle toughness. Mommy and Daddy aren't going to insist that you wear appropriate clothing no matter what your wishes and desires may be, but a school administrator might. We went through this with our son many times. The cow hoodie incident should have been handled much differently, but this isn't a call to drag your children to the sanctity of your home and never allow them to learn how to deal.
To the anon above from the blogger:
Sure, my ultimate goal is for my children to live in the 'normal' world as successful individuals. I just have madae the decision that the public school system is not the means for me to achieve that goal. I just don't agree with the major goals of the PS system. I sure don't see the school's issue with a cow hoodie. I guess that school is so perfect that the only thing they need to be concerned about is appropriate clothing.
I was a public school teacher and I've just chosen something else for my children. Something that meets their needs in a better way and provide a higher level of education. (Much higher...I tutor high school students. My 7th grader can run rings around them.)
Post a Comment